So I got this crazy hunch to try and eat for a while like my ancestors supposedly did. Not Mexicans in Mexico right now, but before European and Spanish folks showed up on the scene. I guess I just wanted to do it sort of as a personal experiment, out of curiosity. Not trying to be a purist or anything.
I already know a good deal about foods indigenous to the area my family comes from in southern Mexico, thanks to the archaeology classes took while getting my BA in anthropology. Beans, squash, and maize the biggest staples, as well as fruits I don’t really have access to unfortunately, besides lime, and veggies. Anyway, this pretty much takes dairy (mostly cheese – I’m not 100% on what other dairy products southern Mexicans may have eaten or not eaten, but cheese was definitely brought to the culture by Europeans) and wheat out of my diet for the most part.
If you didn’t already know, the amazing this is that corn and beans are extremely complimentary together as far as nutritional value. The amino acids form a perfect protein – and it’s vegetarian! Gee. The corn was processed using lime juice to soften it up before making it into tortillas or whatever, adding even more good vitamins to the mix, and when the corn was ground down using stone tools, important minerals got into the mix. The result was a very simple but healthy foundation diet, with the addition of local fruits and veggies.
Lately I’ve just been eating super simple. Like I’ll just open up a can of black beans, warm it up on the stove and throw in some chopped jalepeno, cilantro, a tomato, and squeeze in some lime juice, then eat it with a couple corn tortillas on the side with lime juice squeezed over.
So I haven’t really been eating cheese or wheat the past week or so. Today I huge craving for enchiladas, though. Miraculously, there’s a really good Mexican restaurant just down the street from my house (I say miraculously, because I’m from southern California and I now live in the Midwest where it’s been tough to find really good Mexican food). I went down there and got myself cheese enchiladas.
And wow do I feel sick now. Enchiladas always used to make me sick, but that was because my mom almost always made them on flour tortillas, unless she was using my papa’s recipe, and the flour tortillas are what I thought really made me sick. I would sometimes ask her to buy corn tortillas so I could make my own enchiladas using those. Anyway… the greasy cheese seems to not agree with me.
Also, in the past week, I’ve amazingly been eating a lot less sort of naturally and I’ve lost a few pounds. The not eating cheese thing probably has a lot to do with it by itself, but the food I’ve been eating has just felt so much more satiating. I feel … well fed. It’s sort of strange. I’ve only been eating two small meals a day, and feeling totally fine. Whereas before I was eating not as healthy food and I was eating a lot more – hence why I've put on a good deal of weight the past year, especially since I got a car and stopped walking as much this past year.
Anyway, this enchilada situation just affirmed my decision to avoid cheese.
This experiment has been pretty interesting. It’s also kind of comforting to eat this way. I think I’m gonna stick with it for now.
It’s been such a beautiful day with people delivering flowers to every room in the school except mine. And the two associates in my room, they DID get flowers- they just grabbed them in the office. #thesingleslife
I was all bitter about it being Valentine’s Day for some odd reason? PMS? I’m not sure. I usually LOVE holidays including Valentine’s Day and go all out, if even just for the girls.
I didn’t do shit this year for Valentine’s Day. Felt a little guilty earlier, so ran to the store quick to get balloons and some cute stuff for the girls as a surprise when they get home. I think they’ll like it. :) Which is great!
Not sure why I’m so pissed about it this year.
Probably because, in all honesty, Kyle SHOULD be acknowledging it’s existence being that I went over to get boxes for the girls from his place and he kept talking and visiting and asking me about my job situation and trying to kiss me. Which is odd that he didn’t just go in for a kiss. But he came right up to me and I said “oh and I’m supposed to just kiss you now, huh” and he said “haven’t you seen hitch?” “Of course I’ve fucking seen hitch, kyle, kevin james is my man….and I know the 90/10 rule. and fuck the 90/10 rule.” and he just laughed and said “alright then..”
I think he was actually rather put on by it, to tell you the truth. But I got up off the floor and said I had to go. (Which I did, I had been there longer than I’d told the girls already- and we had to do Valentine’s still...)
SO THEN that paired with the not being able to just let me go thing….. I don’t know.
I’m just bitter about it.
it started out with a revised letter from the odp! they've already dropped the expected amount of community time from 75% to 25% by the fall of 2019.
that's significantly more reasonable.
they also changed some of the criteria for which clients would be eligible for the community time (they decided to count vocational community time).
the best part though?!
they added a requirement that the client be allowed to opt out of the community time, and remain in a workshop, if they chose to. previously, it said nothing about the client being able to make a choice, despite the objective being, “give clients a choice!”
soooo i was fucking stoked about that. apparently all i had to do was expel energy by writing my concerns, and somehow the universe responded!
i spent the rest of the day listening to my coworker worry over what to do about school, and life in general. she told me today that she couldn't keep working there, that she is getting burnt out.
i didn't know what exactly to tell her, except that i understood the feeling, and that that's why i’m so cautious about what clients i take. i don't want to feel sad about the job i do. i love it so much, the idea of not enjoying it just kills me.
but really, i don't think she's suited for this profession. she's chronically stressed, and unhappy, and has openly admitted to “tuning out” clients :/
i understand that there are moments where a strategic ignore is in place for certain clients, because responding or attempting to reason or redirect a specific topic might make the fixation worse for the client. but that's not the case 95% of the time.
i also understand that shes referring to ability to ignore things that bother you personally; when a client does something that gets to you, like open mouth chewing, or something else they can't help, you try to ignore it entirely.
but i have also seen her blow off doing her job so she could be on her phone, or read whatever she's behind on for school. i have seen her “tune out” while she needs to be exceptionally aware of whats happening (particularly at times when all the clients are up and moving, as there are always a few “fall risks” ).
i watched her take the key for the private bathroom today, leave without telling anyone, be gone for about 10 minutes, then come in, look at her phone (which she had with her), and then turn around and walk literally right back out into the hallway, where she was gone for another ten minutes. the program director noticed, and even said, “what was that?”
so then i'm on my way home from shopping after work, and i come to a stop sign, and make a left hand turn.
i straightened my car out, and noticed a lady in an suv was pulling out of her parking space and was going to hit me.
she was parked in a horizontal street parking space, so she had the ability to see that i was literally RIGHT NEXT TO HER.
i slammed on my brakes and my horn.
i pulled the left side of my neck from tensing up.
but she stopped, and i was able to slow down and swerve, and no one got fucked up. besides my neck.
and then she did it to the car after the car behind me, too. i know, because i heard beeping, and looked in my rear view mirror to see basically a reenactment of what i had just gone through.
long. strange. day.
I’m heartless that way. Having a pet has never been worth the amount of money their inevitable sickness is going to cost, nor is it worth them throwing up or going to the bathroom everywhere during their decline, nor are they worth FLEAS. I’m so sick of having fleas in my life. So there’s a bit of an outbreak at my house right now. The damn cat brought in fleas and I guess the flea medication my parents used to use is not really effective right now so I find fleas on my damn self every day. Now when I find them I crush them between my finger tips and then put them on my desk and burn them with my lighter until I am sure they’re dead. At which point I crush their corpses into nothing. In the time it has taken me to write this entry I have found 4 fleas on me. I’m finding more every day and I’m sick of it.
Don’t judge me but…
I can’t wait for my parent’s cat to die.