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(no subject)
 
1 hr ago / @mel674 +
(no subject) OK- Finally got the “unofficial official” verbal clarification from the principal for next…
 
7 hrs ago / @almost23 +
(no subject) I have a burning desire to see the Lion King. Maybe the girls will join me tonight for a Disney movie…
 
10 hrs ago / @almost23 +
(no subject)
 I like this x 1
yesterday / @almost23 +
(no subject)

Another stupid thing is, the ones that have told me i had a son when i was about 15. Hey, i doubt it. if i did, i would know it and have a child, but i don’t. My whole life is constant realistic nightmares. All the moments that they had me in, all those crazy created moments of having me sit in groups of strangers. The problem is, i have no idea how it all got started or how i got to those people in the first place and why have i all my life been unable to remember anything important. the idiot boy from class bugs me now when i think back to the time when some others tried to tell me he is special. i say his no more special than all the other kids. He is not related to me and i don’t know him. all there are are those strange memories/visions when some smartass tried to convince me i have a son. i am so sick and tired of all of those scenes. Moreover, i remember some strange moments about the Daim chocolate from childhood and about the local small bookstore. I remember the darkness of the store Selver and the cafeteria Viiger. And there’s so much more. How do the people do that? What got it all started?

 

 
13 hrs ago / @ontheway +
(no subject) People do have talents of driving me crazier than i already am. Many moments seem to be repeating…
 
18 hrs ago / @ontheway +
 
(no subject)
 
21 hrs ago / @mel674 +
(no subject) People are talented.
 I like this x 1
yesterday / @ontheway +
Woo my brain hurts! I’m making it with a 4.0 in school still somehow, I feel like I’m being…
 
yesterday / @Millenia +
(no subject) “I can never read all of the books I want; I can never be all of the people I want and live all…
 
yesterday / @almost23 +
(no subject) HA- solving problems one phone call at a time. All ya gotta do is call child support and poke around…
 
yesterday / @almost23 +
(no subject)

It’s amazingly ridiculous what happens when the clouds and darkness turn to sunshine and warmth (figuratively AND literally). The sun came out after a crazy foggy morning. Like, we haven’t had sun for DAYS… possibly even a couple of weeks. It’s been SEVERAL DAYS.

DAMN, I just feel rejuvenated. I just looked outside and decided to make a “to do” list for tonight!

 

It includes running…!!! AND reading … AND cleaning!!

And damnit- I think they’ll all actually get done! BECAUSE I’m motivated. It’s like the sun has the power to pull me out of the stupid funk I sometimes find myself in. The fine line between “this sucks” and “I really truly think I might have slight depression for realz”.

And now I’m all “nope. I don’t think I do. I think I just needed a healthy dose of Vitamin C and that’ll do the trick.

 

See, it also does crazy things like make me reconsider not applying for the job in KC and all sorts of other things that I probably shouldn’t do at the moment.

 

I’ve actually decided to for surely just do the 2nd grade deal here (I think that’s the grade that’ll be available for next year), if at all just for the experience! I mean, that way I’ll be totally more marketable in the “teaching world”. I’ll have preschool, 2nd grade, special education, yadda yadda yadda. :) Sure can’t hurt anything, ya know!?

 

OK- but for real. On a sidenote that’s kind of a bummer and a bring-me-down. WHY in the hell can’t I just get some child support, guys?! I mean, for fucks sake here!!!! I’m RAISING TWO CHILDREN IN MY LIFE, CAN YOU THROW ME A FRICKIN BONE HERE, WORLD?!?!?!ugh. :D

 

 
yesterday / @almost23 +
(no subject) The girls and I had a beautiful time in Minneapolis. It’s funny (ish?) how you can take a…
 I like this x 1
2 days ago / @almost23 +
Time for that Elusive Update Entry! Hey guys. So. Reading back those last few entries, I left you all while…
 I like this x 3I like this x 3I like this x 3
5 days ago / @commntyblackman +
 
Fuck alarm clocks I just want to be able to get decent sleep. Child won't go to bed until 1130 pm…
 I like this x 1
yesterday / @insanereid +
(no subject) This morning I woke up to a dense fog advisory on my phone and a reported temp of 55 degrees. Then I…
 I like this x 1
3 days ago / @divine +
Welcome to the "real world" she said to me, condescendingly

Good news/bad news

 

Good: I took my senior/graduation pictures on Saturday. I had so much fun! I hired my instagram friend Monica, who does photography as a hobby, to take them for me. We had never met IRL, but we have been mutually following each other for at least a year, if not two. So it was super easy to click right away. We went all over campus and got some great shots. She finished editing them today, so I got all sentimental and wrote up a big post about how proud and excited I am to be graduating, and posted my pictures. If it wasn’t such a pain in the ass, I’d post them here. Alas, it is. (Go follow me in IG if you don’t already: @mystupidmouth). Anyway something about doing that photoshoot and seeing the outcome made my impending graduation seem real; tangible. Plus the pictures came out SO GOOD. I’m starting to get really excited. I was still riding that high when…

 

Bad: I found out that I lose my campus job as soon as I graduate. I asked weeks ago if I would be able to keep working there after graduation. Well. My boss finally talked to her superiors and HR, and basically long story short I don’t get to. So that leaves me without a job from graduation (May 19th) through moving day (August 1st), which is just barely over two months. It’s not that there isn’t work available, I just need to be offered something right away and get started. I won’t have time for well, let me interview you, call you a few days later, give you a start date, push it back, blah blah. Which is been my experience more often than not. And of course, they have to not care that I am leaving after 8 weeks. I’ll probably end up waiting tables or something, which sounds abysmal, but I guess you gotta do what you gotta do. It’s short term. 

 

“Here’s your degree that you worked long and hard for, not to mention spent a TON of money getting. Now here, go wait tables.”

 

 
yesterday / @mystupidmouth +
(no subject) So tonight. i guess I'm just lonely??? Idk kyle snap chatted me earlier, which I would…
 
yesterday / @almost23 +
(no subject) GHah I had an awesome time in Minneapolis. Like I might have mentioned before (I’m not…
 
2 days ago / @almost23 +
too damn much I got a $450 bill from my pain management doctor today. For the fucking drug test I’m…
 
2 days ago / @xRainbows4eveRx +
 
(no subject) I'm going to be 28 and I need to stop letting my anxiety run my life. I need to do more for Me.…
 I like this x 1
2 days ago / @insanereid +
 
(no subject)
 
2 days ago / @mel674 +
 
(no subject)
 
2 days ago / @mel674 +
 
Thinking about ink

I have my birthday off from work (April 3rd)

Seriously considering making an appointment for a tattoo but I have NO IDEA what I want.

I want a Kikis Delivery Service tattoo. Originally thought to put that on my right thigh but thinking I want to make it into a half sleeve on my right arm…

....but that's where I was thinking about putting my "coloring page" (Bunch of characters not colored in so I can carry around markers be a portable coloring page)

I could move my coloring arm to the left side. Which would make sense considering I'm right handed. (So I can still use my dominant hand while being colored on)

I was thinking of doing a Zelda tattoo over there but was thinking of just doing the crest on my left forearm. Or the master sword. Idk.

I was considering doing the 4 Elements symbols from The last Airbender on my wrists. (Two on each arm. One on one side. The other on the opposite)

The thing about that... I prefer the symbols the shitty ass movie used. Especially the earth symbol.... But the movie was sooooooooo bad! (Visually I loved it. The detail in Aangs tattoo. What the Kyoshi warriors were gonna look like. Amazing)

With this tattoo I want it to be colored. I don't know how though. Should I just do the symbols in the Colors representing them? I feel like this would be the best simplest route.

 

Okay. So while writting this, I think I've decided.

I'll get my 4 elements tattoos April 3rd. Each just an outline in their own color.

We all know how much I could use some balance in my life right now.

In May, I think I'll get my Kiki tattoo with Ryan for his birthday tattoo adventure. 

 

 I like this x 1Love x 1
6 days ago / @insanereid +
 
florida life update Just a little update because I know a year from now, when I come back to read this, I…
 
3 days ago / @chel2thec +
scraps recently, john told me that he didn't think i needed any support. "you're a strong…
 I like this x 1
3 days ago / @morte +
Instagram Posts Friday: allude to my own bisexuality and my coming to terms with it via vague song lyric in…
 
3 days ago / @mystupidmouth +
(no subject) just woke up from a dream where i'm living next door to these people, really nosey, presumptuous…
 I like this x 1
4 days ago / @morte +
If I was granted 3 wishes. One of them would probably would be that this plays before I ejaculate.
 I like this x 1
4 days ago / @cornholio23 +
ingrained pretension i have a problem with judgmental thinking. i really can't help myself. the…
 I like this x 1
5 days ago / @morte +
Get Set

Am I the only person who cleans before going on vacation like most people clean before hosting during the holidays? Like, there’s no attempts at trickery in it. During the holidays, if you’re hosting, most people go INSANE with cleaning the house top to bottom, because there are going to be a significant number of people spending a significant amount of time in your house and many of them WILL be judging you during that time. So you clean the shit out of your house, not leaving a corner of a room tucked behind a dresser left with dust or a single paper left unfiled. 

 

That’s how I clean for vacation. 

 

Because vacation is relaxing. Vacation can be a much needed ‘reset’ to life, or at least the year. And I just want to come home to an environment that is all ready for whoever I am when I return. It’s like… how you clean for people coming to stay who you love having - to ensure they’re comfortable in your home and everything’s in place so you can focus on hosting them rather than the trivialities of daily life – that’s how I clean for my future self who comes home for vacation. 

 

Anyway, back to cleaning. I have a shit ton to do still just around the house, then I have to officially start packing (I’ve started making small piles of stuff, but now things have to start going in the suitcase), then take my fern to my friend Alex who’s keeping it for me while I’m gone. I’m really glad he’s keeping it for me because I don’t think I really trust anyone else with it. He loves plants and I think he’s the only friend I have who really does (which is kinda weird now that I think about it...) so I know he’ll care for it well. Then I have to finish packing, like completely have everything but my toothbrush and makeup ready to go out the door because I work until 11pm tonight, then come home and get to sleep right away because I work at 7am tomorrow, then leave work at 2 and have to rush to the airport to catch my 7pm flight. 

 

Jeff made a good point last night that makes me nervous. He pointed out that we’re going into the city of Chicago to catch a 7pm flight on a Saturday. My only prayer…. is that the fucking Blackhawks aren’t playing. Because if they are, we MIGHT miss our flight. Unless by some miracle I can get off work earlier, or his brother is a navigational genius and can get us there faster. 

 

Okay, well fuck. I just checked and the Blackhawks ARE playing, at 6pm though. But that still means when we’re trying to get into the city and to the airport, a ton assholes are going to clogging up the streets trying to get to United Center before 6! D:

 

 

I Google Map’d it and getting to the airport by 5 tomorrow will take between 35-50 minutes. But I doubt that takes into account the Hawks game! 

 

Anyway, Happy Friday. :)

 

 

 
5 days ago / @divine +
I'd hit that Gerald McRaney...This is a pretty good movie too.
 
5 days ago / @palaceofperseph +
 

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